lucy

vitasvirginia:

emily dickinson said “say, sea, / take me!” and virginia woolf said “i said to the star: ‘consume me’”

(Source: vitaandvirginia2018, via dorknewton)

snakegay:

[tumblr geek after being bitten by a black mamba] oh no!! danger noodle does an anger! scaly pupper! she protec but also attac!

(via walkinganalbeads)

5000angryspiders:

oddpyromaniac:

incubchii:

oddpyromaniac:

sorry:

sleepy-loopin:

bakabon-no-papa:

bakabon-no-papa:

bakabon-no-papa:

i found a christian retelling of the first harry potter book and it claims that birthdays are unholy and are made up

some highlights

• Ron is a Slytherin
  
• Draco is a Ravenclaw AND a mysogonist
  
• Snape isn’t a cunt and is really nice and caring towards Harry
  
• Angels have replaced owls
  
• Dean Thomas is a main character for no reason
  
• Dumbledore isn’t gay and is married to a woman and is ALSO Hermionies dad
  
• It doesn’t take place in the UK for some reason
  
• Wizard duels are now called pray-offs

I’ll add more when i read more

more

• Harry converts Draco into being a Gryffindor (who are depicted as pitch perfect Christians who follow the bible closely and only take orders from God)
  
• Eco friendly-ness is bad apparently
  
• Voldemort has hair
  
• Believing in evolution is apparently Satanic
  
• Voldemort wanted to make Christianity ILLEGAL
  
• Voldemort ALSO has a Reddit account
  
• Dumbledore calls Reddit a “godless coven”
  
• THEY LITERALLY TRY AND CONVERT VOLDEMORT INTO BEING A CHRISTIAN
  
• Harry says that Voldemort has been tricked by the lies of society and that he deserves to burn in hell 
  
• ““I’m just so upset that you don’t accept the Bible,” Hermionie sobbed femininely. “The Bible is the best book ever. Why can’t you respect that?”“
  
• Voldemort is described as a fornicating, drug-addicted evolutionist (Actually, this is what the author says that all Evolutionists are like this)
  

I can’t believe i found a fic to rival My Immortal

This is some anti My Immortal shit

how does one sob femininely? 

PLEASE SOMEONE SEND ME A NAME OR A LINK TO THIS

https://m.fanfiction.net/s/10644439/1/Hogwarts-School-of-Prayer-and-Miracles

I love you thank you

Dumbledore is married to McGonagall.

There are several paragraphs describing beloved fictional characters’ chest hair.

Slytherins are Catholics.

Petunia wears pant suits.

(via dorknewton)

cabronallorona:

naxzella:

finding out people dont usually add numbers by first adding something to make a ten (for example 7+6= 7 plus 3 is 10 plus another 3 is 13) & that its actually an adhd thing is the WILDEST shit literally ive lived like 10 years (or however old i was when i learned to add and stuff) thinking thats how everyone does it. what the fuck

What

(Source: gayrodrick, via dorknewton)

poedaemerons:

Not to riff on an already iconic post but i sincerely hope all the 90 year olds at my screening of The Favourite enjoyed watching Emma Stone and Rachel Weiz fight over who gets to go down on Queen Anne

(via myhumbleme)

casbian:

i usually hate true crime documetary type things bc theyre all “lets get into the MIND of the serial killer…. tortured soul” or whatever but i like the buzzfeed unsolved stuff bc theyre just like “what a freak lmao”

(via spacesapphist)

damianalghul:

ladies who have had a crush on miss Anne Hathaway since The Princess Diaries make some noise!!!!!

(Source: harlivy, via myhumbleme)

raejin99:

slbtumblng:

carnival-phantasm:

Every apex predator, looking at a capybara chilling: “…nah, I can’t eat this dude, that would be fucked up”

(via ealthia)

dicapriho:

john krasinski did a far better job for his first feature film as actor-turned-director, than bradley cooper did for a star is born. without question. john deserves the award season hype; he created something original, unique and terrifying with his wife and made audiences shut the fuck up and listen, he demanded people sit and pay attention and gave a platform to a deaf actress which made the film even more important. not to mention that he set the stage for emily, whose character kicked-ass, went through hell and kept on going

(via myhumbleme)

chancethereaper:

space-lesbo:

jabariqueen:

erikkillmongerdontpullout:

ororosmunroe:

ya’ll headcanoning Miles shoplifting art supplies on the regular when canonically he can’t even get away with tagging a postal box with a removable sticker…is very sus…

Whites: so he uhhh is black…so they STEAL but he does it artistically….UwU

It shows they really want to apply racist stereotypes to miles even though it doesn’t make any sense whatsoever lol. First of all Miles is a good kid who would never steal and his family clearly has enough money to buy art supplies, even the expensive kind lol. And even if he wanted to steal something, you think Jefferson would let him get away with it?? Never have I heard someone headcanoning Spiderman as a thief. Spiderman, the friendly neighborhood hero who walks people home and stop people from robbing stuff, is gonna steal stuff from art stores????

miles wouldn’t steal anything ever. he’s too good a kid to

(via diaanaprnce)